Monday, October 5, 2009

Weekend Recap: The Maturity Index

I have been putting on anti-wrinkle cream since I was 17. Paige won't touch diet soda. I wear sunscreen in December, at night. Pagie dabbles in yoga and spinning and I can still do the splits, on both sides. Despite all of this, we are getting older, physically. Paige can no longer drink 17 PBR's in one weekend and somehow lose 5 lbs. I cannot sleep in makeup and black liquid eyeliner every night and wake up looking like a "refreshed" fourteen-year-old. We have to work harder and harder at staying "youthful" in our 20's. But that's just the physical part.
Mentally it's a struggle. My room is everything pastel and is adorned with seashells and sketches of tutu's. Paige has a hardback copy of Eloise next to her bed. I have Tropical Skittles for lunch and popcorn for dinner. There isn't one second a Degrassi episode that Paige hasn't seen, twice. We both pinch eachother in protest of something the other one says. It wouldn't be uncommon to catch either of us listening to Amy Grant or Miley Cyrus. We put the Olsen twins on the same pedestal we do God and Josh Schwartz.
Therefore, we have, after a foggy afternoon of bloody mary's and kittens, decided to figure out how old we really are after one of our infamous weekends. Every Monday, should we be responsible enough, we will post things we did over the weekend with a corresponding age in our opinion. We understand that people of all ages go to the gym, write letters to relatives, and buy socks (the kind that don't glisten), however, we consider these activities to be on the mature side. The quality of our booze, music preference, and outfits will all be weighed in. This could get tricky. We know there are, ahem, women, who are 40+ and choose to wear fishnets and thigh high boots, however we would probably place such an outfit as ahem, age appropriate.

We encourage comments and suggestions, such as:
"Did you really need TWO (2!) different kinds of butter on your corn?" Age 11
"Well one of the kinds of butter was jalapeƱo flavored so..." Age 21
"You were able to keep your $.39 an ounce yogurt to under $5.00?" Age 30
"You ate a giant Bahn Mi afterward?" Age 19
"You stayed in to play Dominos, drinking wine and catching up" Age 42
"You used crass and at times flat-out cruel language in mocking one another for losing, and some possible cheating involved" Age 6

Last weekend was pretty awesome, and we therefore we won't deny our friends and mothers of a Weekend Recap: The Maturity Index. Trust me, we are just as curious as you (hi Mom and Barb) to figure out our average age based on the events that happened last weekend. Between doing laundry (how mature) and watching Gossip Girl (errr not really) we will post our first of many Weekend Recaps. Ciao!

Also: some here's an age related mindblower for you: