Thursday, June 10, 2010

ABSOLUT: FDP

So tonight we are going to a launch party for ABSOLUT Brooklyn. I know, as my mom said "oh god....." And as always, we are of course delighted to be invited to any party thats open bar, especially if its for a vodka that celebrates our very own borough. But we did have some questions, this is ABSOLUT Brooklyn so it must tatse like... Brooklyn? What does that even mean? Apparently it is apple and ginger flavored, which confuses me and excites Holly, but lets face it we normally drink Vanilla Georgi so we are in no way a "good judge" of quality spirits. So all of this got us thinking. If there were to be an Absolut Paige or and Absolut Holly, what would they taste like? And what do we, in our infinite Brooklyn knowledge, believe Absolut Brooklyn should actually taste like? Our musings below:
Absolut Paige:
I once famously told the sommelier at a wine tasting that the "Riesling tastes just like a My Little Pony smells", this was totally true, but that doesn't make it any less embarrassing. So if there were to be an Absolut Paige I would want it to taste like the smell of my favorite childhood toy, a cupcake-scented my little pony. The bottle would be sparkle pink with a prancing pony on it and the lid would have a tail hanging off of it and something would probably light-up. ABSOLUT PAIGE
Paige's Absolut Brooklyn:
To me, Absolut Brooklyn shouldn't taste like apple and ginger, though I get it. Apples and ginger are things they sell at farmers markets and farmers markets are like, so Brooklyn right now. But to me, an authentic Absolut Brooklyn would be a little.... dirtier. My Absolut Brooklyn, like my Riesling experience would deal more with olfactory senses and probably less with taste. So, my favorite Brooklyn smell is the smell of the hidden bakery that exists somewhere near our apartment. No matter WHAT anytime after 5pm in our hood you smell baking cookies and its incredible. So it would basically be cookie dough vodka, and the signature cocktail would be Absolut (Cookie Dough) Brooklyn Vodka mixed with PBR because... yeah.
Absolute Holly:
I am not known for my good in taste in food (or really anything else except maybe legwarmers and giftwrapping) so Absolute Holly will follow suit. I famously love Good'n'Plenty's because you can ask anyone if they would like some, and that they may have as many as they would like, and yet NO ONE ever wants one, while I still look like a charitable candy-sharer. So Absolute Holly would taste like delicious Good'n'Plenty's and maybe it would be giftwrapped or have a legwarmer around it or something just for good measure.
Absolute Brooklyn:
My favorite Brooklyn food to put in my mouth are the donuts at Peter Pan in Greenpoint. I go there on Saturday mornings and watch all of the adults order bagels and compare whie I contrast the donut selection with all of the 4+ year olds. So to me, an Absolute Brooklyntini would be more like a spiked vanilla donut, with sprinkles of course.

So there you have it. Our Absolut-ly FDP ideas. Would you drink our signature vodkas?

Forever your Girl,
Paige

4 comments:

  1. I was looking for an image of a pink My Little Pony to use as my mascot for Fantasy Football and came across this blog.
    I enjoyed the read! I especially enjoyed the thought process behind the Good n Plenty. I do the exact same thing except I do it with Tabasco or some kind of wicked hot sauce instead! Care for some?! ;)

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  2. That's funny. I did the same thing; I was looking for a my little pony picture and came across your blog. I really enjoyed reading it. It made me giggle and makes me think of my girlfriends and our thought process as well. In fact, that is why I was looking for a my little pony picture. We are screen printing it on our shirts for the Knarley Neon 5k we are going together. Thank you for sharing.

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  3. I am really stumped about how Brooklyn tastes. I agree that it should be grittier than farmers markets because we're talking about BK and not a suburb of St Paul, MN, maybe a half eaten Junior's cheesecake and a cigarette butt

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