Friday, March 5, 2010

Oscar Day Itinerary
It's no secret that Paige and myself love love award shows. What's not to love? They are a great excuse to eat a bunch of junk food while drinking cocktails for hardly any reason at all. They make it seem like watching hours of non-CNN television seem like an event, like we are DOING something. Lets also not forget that after a hungover brunch that hopefully consists of French fries we aren't always very sure of what to do with ourselves. Having an "event" to "attend" gives our Sunday a purpose.
If you haven't heard, this Sunday is the award show of award shows: The Oscars. Our award show party needs to be that of Oscar-caliber and must be well-thought out and planned, just like, oh say, Sandra Bullock needs to plan out her Oscar day.
Here is our Oscar Day itinerary:

6:30am Kristy wakes up everyone in the house via crawling into bed and cuddling
6:42am Kristy realizes this really isn't appreciated yet and goes to her own room
6:45am Kristy is able to fall back asleep
7:25am Holly/Paige are finally able to fall back asleep
8:45am Everyone girlpiles on the couch to recap Saturday night, arguments about coffee brand and strength ensue
9:00am fingers crossed for Degrassi
11:00am Everyone heads to get brunchy food that needs to include French fries for Holly
11:12am Discussion on what sort of Oscar party food we will devour...Avatartes? The Blind Sliders? A Single Flan? James Camerones?

Oscar Ava'tartare'

11:30am Paige eats her fries with mustard
12:00am We decide to go to Bleeker St to take our mind off of the coming night's excitement
12:30 Go to Marc by Marc Jacobs an elbow tourists while looking at handbags we won't be able to afford unless we win an Oscar one day
1:00pm We start second guessing some of our Oscar picks so get a pick-me-up, pay-what-it-weighs-FroYo

1:30pm We all start freaking out we might miss one second of one of Ryan Seacrests awkward red carpet interviews and decide we need to shop for our Oscar Apps
2:15pm Walk around the fabulous Met Supermarket in Clinton Hill shopping for peanut butter, marshmallows, Dumps, candy corn, ingredients for meatballs, etc.

The ever-so-quaint Met Foods in Clinton Hill

2:40pm We all start freaking out we might miss one of Miss Jay's red carpet makeovers to make some poor girl look like Kristen Stewart and hurry our asses home

3:00pm We put on Madonna's "Vogue" and start getting red carpet-ready
3:02pm Dancing in our own respective "gowns" ensues
3:10pm Kristy gives us red carpet Updo's that rival those that will be madeover by Jay Manuel

A silver fox but different.

4:00pm We look at the Oscar Countdown and watch Chris Harrison's "Road to Oscars" video on
4:30pm We look at movie trailers on Paige's computer and usually a couple fights start about this for various reasons
5:30pm Girlfights are resolved and everyone starts making The Oscar Feast
6:00pm We all sit on the couch or the floor with our Oscar feast on our closed laptops and pig out while complaining that Guliana Rancic is too too skinny
We wouldn't call this a "natural" glow...

8:00pm Turn of E! and Guliana and Jay Manuel and Ryan Seacrest and turn on The Oscars (squeal!)
8:10pm We wait until Steve Martin and Alex Baldwin are done speaking to talk about our individual love and attraction for these silver foxes

There is no age for love

9:00pm Assemble The Second Oscar Feast
9:30pm Kristy falls asleep on someones shoulder but still wakes up to smile and nod her opinions about big Oscar Wins

At whatever time the Oscars are done we get into Paige's toaster and fall asleep. Meryl Streep narrates our dreams of gold men and men with silver hair like Jay Manuel and people with orange skin like Guliana.

Forever Your Girl,

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